Ah, Season 16. Producer Graham Williams is in the middle of his tenure and it's a more self-assured man with a vision, steering the show in the direction of big ideas, increased humour and references freely cribbed from the pages of literature. Tom Baker is equally confident in his fifth year as the Doctor. Perhaps too confident. There is an notable flippancy in his performance which is starting to grate with me a just a tiny bit.
This is where we are offered a 26 episode epic the likes of which had never been tried before on Doctor Who. Sure, in the early days of William Hartnell we had one story flowing into another on a week-by-week basis, and during the Pertwee era there was the Frontier In Space / Planet Of The Daleks duology (plus the undercurrent of the Doctors attempts to get to Metebelis 3 and the fallout from that) - but this is meant to be something more complex, more ambitious.
The thing is, it's not really. It turns out that the Key to Time MacGuffin is only incidental to most of the plots (except the last story) and there is a lot more fun to be had with the other things the writers have to say.
Unfortunately my plan to cover the whole of Season 16 in one gigantic post has gone awry due to forces beyond my control. Add to that, despite my stated aim to only write short comments on each story, I keep finding things I want to say! So this time round we have...
The Ribos Operation
There's a lot to like about this tale of confidence tricksters trying to sell a planet to a greedy tyrant. It's Robert Holmes doing what he does best - creating a believable world not too distant from our own, a homage to a famous film (in this case 'The Sting') and likeable double acts delivering sparkling dialogue. Throw in some excellent performances, terrific sets and costume designs and appropriate music from the ever-present Dudley Simpson and you have all the ingredients for a winner. It might be a large scale backstory (the quest for the key, selling planets, a deposed warlord) but it's the small moments with the cast of characters that really make this story shine.
In fact we get three sets of double acts this time round - all in a kind of master / protégé relationship. Firstly there's the Doctor and his new companion Romana, the elegant Time Lady who is the Doctor's intellectual equal. The wonderful Mary Tamm plays her at the start as a slightly aloof and arrogant "ice maiden" who thinks she knows best, and there is some lovely sparring with Baker at the beginning of the story. However she soon comes to realise that all her academic experience is useless out in the wilds of the universe. I know that for many Lalla Ward is the definitive Romana (especially given her subsequent Big Finish work in the role), but Mary is just so stunningly beautiful and delivers her lines in that perfect cut-glass accent. She looks like a Greek goddess in those first scenes in the TARDIS. I'll admit I was smitten from the start (forgive me, I was eleven years old).
Our second duo is of course shysters Garron and Unstoffe. The seasoned thief teaching the tricks of the trade to his young (and possibly cleverer) apprentice. Jago and Litefoot might be the gold standard for Holmesian partnerships, but these two run a very close second. Iain Cuthbertson steals every scene he is in, with his accent veering from a posh drawl to a cockney barrow boy, depending on who he is talking to / trying to scam. It reminds me of those days when people like my grandparents had a "telephone voice". Unstoffe may start out seeming just a lackey to his bombastic partner, but it soon becomes apparent that he is the moral heart of the pairing.
The camaraderie and playful bantering of the two conmen is counterpointed by the dastardly duo of the Graf Vynda K and Sholakh. The Graff is a noble but dangerously unbalanced man - tipped over the edge into paranoia by the supposed betrayal of his former subjects when they deposed him from the throne. Paul Seed plays him just the right side of parody, with the hint of madness in his eyes convincing you that this is a man who will stop at nothing to achieve his goals. Sholakh gets less characterisation but it's clear that Vynda-K totally depends on his lieutenant as the only man he can trust. Just look at his reaction to Sholakh's sudden death.
As great as these three sets of characters are, they are overshadowed by a lowly outcast who theorises about the universe beyond the confines of his own world. Binro The Heretic makes no real contribution to the plot. The Doctor and Romana don't even meet him. Yet the beautifully played low-key scene between Binro and Unstoffe is at the heart of "The Ribos Operation" and is one of the defining moment of the show's Classic era. Binro is not a hero - he is a dreamer who dares to think differently to his contemporaries who are hide bound by their religious beliefs and superstitions - and they reject and shun him for it, in the same way enlightened thinkers on Earth were persecuted during the middle ages. It's just magical. What is interesting though is that as much as Holmes wants the audience to sympathise with Binro (because we know he *is* right) the Seekers prophecies of doom also come true. Magic and science seem to exist together on this world.
Elsewhere the sets and costumes are exceptional and really add to the script's 'medieval Russian' vs. 'crawling into the future' feel. Everything has a weight to it that transcends its studio-bound origins. The Schrivenzale is acceptable for its few minor appearances, and reliable old Prentis Hancock always gives good value in his limited role as Captain of the Shrieve. It's a great start to the season and the search for the Key to Time. This story has always been one of my favourites, and re-watching it has only confirmed its place in my affections.
The Pirate Planet
Now I'm going to say something controversial here.
Deep breath.
Here goes.
I'm not the greatest fan of this story. I'm not even convinced it's actually very good.
Before you all tear down the walls of the internet to rip me apart for Doctor Who heresy, hear me out. I wouldn't dream of arguing with anyone who said it was their favourite story and I do think that Adams is playing with some genuinely clever SF ideas here. A hollow, space-jumping planet that eats other worlds for lunch, crushing them to the size of grapefruit. An ancient queen, kept alive in the moment before death in a stasis field. Even the Mentiads as an expanding gestalt with extra-sensory powers are an interesting concept (although being telepathic apparently means you have to look like you've had no sleep for twenty years and wander around all day in your yellow pyjamas). The central mystery also has some sinister undertones and plenty of twists along the way. The apparent bad guys are not what they seem. It all sounds so promising, and I wanted to like it, I really did.
But my problem is that as good as the concepts are, I just can't get past the dire performances and the pedestrian direction. The Pirate Captain may be meant to be a dangerous clever villain with a cunning plan to double cross his mistress, but it doesn't work - he just gets on my nerves. Not only is he nothing more than an assortment of obvious pirate tropes transferred to an SF setting, there's no nuance at all to the performance - it's just shouting, more shouting and some extra loud shouting for good measure. Oh and look, even more shouting. Gatherer Hade from "The Sun Makers" doesn't seem quite so bad now and Stephen Thorne's Eldrad seems positively meek by comparison. Any subtly about how the cyborg realises the control he is under and plots to seize power for himself is lost under Bruce Purchase’s blustering buffoonery. If you want to see how to get this kind of character right, just look at the Vogon Captain in the "Hitchhikers" TV show. Another Adams script. A similar charcter. Just a much better performance.
The rest of the incidental characters are no better. The native people of Zanak are beyond dull. (there's a crowd scene with the lamest "hooray" on record). The guards are laughable (I know that's partly the point, but do they have to be so badly acted?). Most of the Mentiads just stand around looking miserable and complaining about their lot. Even evil nursey herself is patchy. As a lurking presence in the background, she's fine. You don't really notice her because the Pirate Captain is just so damn loud and the reveal of her true nature does come as a genuine surprise. Unfortunately when Rosalind Lloyd is called upon to be the manipulative bitch in charge, it just doesn't convince, with some painful delivery.
Tom doesn't escape the ham either. Yes it is Douglas "Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy" Adams we are talking about, so there is some of his trademark witty dialogue, but Baker is in full "silly" mode here (I've always preferred the more serious Fourth Doctor from his early years). The balance between drama and comedy is just "off", with the Doctor one minute passionately expressing his horror at the destruction the Pirate Captain has wrought across the galaxy (a justifiably lauded scene) and then almost immediately veering straight back to mucking about. Oh and I'm done with the constant "Not now, K-9" put-downs to the metal mutt just to try and ring some false tension from the scene.
Don't get me wrong, there *are* things I like about the production. Mr. Fibuli, the Pirate Captain's neurotic right-hand-man - only one-step ahead of getting himself "parroted" to death through a combination of guile and sheer luck - is lovely. He's like a space based Smithers from "The Simpsons" (even though the Captain is not a patch on the villainy of Mr Burns). The location filming in the countryside and the power station does give some needed scale, although it still doesn't feel as if they are part of the same world. But it's slim pickings really. The ending is a sea of technobabble (and I like made up science most of the time), some very dodgy special effects and a bloody big explosion because - yet again - we're back to "if in doubt blow everything up" territory. What about all those people presumably forced to work for the Pirate Captain?
Maybe I was just in a bad mood when I watched this story. Perhaps I'd had as much sleep as the Mentiads across those four days and it's clouded my judgement. One day I'll give it another go and see if it improves. Right now I've no desire to ever watch it again, and there's very little Who I can say that about. Such a shame.
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